| | Episode 23:Space Nomads
The Romulans took the crew of the old USS Dysfunct back to DS9 so they could design and build a new ship and replinish their supply of redshirts. Amoung the various new ensigns one stood out: PittyKitty.
QSMB and DrWho were at Quarks discussing their plans for the new ship and enjoying cold beverages; QSMB had blood (of course) and DrWho42 had something lime green and bubbling that smelled like cheesecake.
"You know," said DrWho to QSMB "I think that PittyKitty girl is kinda nice. I acctually hope she doesn't die."
QSMB gasped "I don't think anyone other than Jim has ever shown compassion towards a redshirt before. I just hope that not everyone thinks that all the girls from our ship are like Claire." QSMB glares at Claire, who's giving a shoulder massage to some Klingon guy. "Speaking of which, got any ideas for the new ship?"
"Oh yeah!" says DrWho42 "I think we should keep it looking the same generally, but just soup it up! I mean make it faster, more weapons, and how about making it more masculine? I mean like a fooseball table, and lots of beer, and no froo-froo interior decorating."
"Ummm. I like the first two ideas, but me and RC worked hard on that interior decorating! I'm sure some how we can make fooseball tables, beer can pyramids and neon signs go with the interior decorating." said QSMB
"Whatever. Now I'm thinking that we could get this puppy up to warp 20..." then Harry ran in and interupted.
"Hey, guys, guess what?" yelled Harry "That Klingon who Claire gave the massage to is letting us rent his ship! See, I told you she'd be useful." The whole crew runs to the Klingon ship.
When they get on the Klingon ship, they're shocked at how spartan it is. "EEEEEWWWWWW! It smells like Klingon B.O." says QSMB, so she and the rest of the girls proceed to scatter scented candles. Then everyone gets ready to leave the station, and to be festive QSMB dresses in Klingon attire.
"My chair's too hard." said VBG
"My chair's way too hard." said RC
"Mine's Juuuuuuuuuust right." said QSMB
"Ok...so how do you turn this thing on?" said VBG as he looked at the Klingon controls. QSMB pushed some random buttons and the controls were no longer in Klingon. They were in Japanese. Then she smacked her head against the wall and pushed some more buttons. The controls were finally in English, but it was some funky calligraphy, still it was somewhat legible.
"Let's see what this puppy can do!" said VBG "QSMB, take us away from the station." QSMB manages to get the ship away from the station, but also manages to get some dents in it and scratch the paint job. "Now let's go....into the wormhole!" They get into the wormhole, but, once inside, THEY GET STUCK!
QSMB curls up into on the floor and starts to go mental "You're all gonna die.....I'll be here alone...for the rest of enterinity...OH THE HUMANITY!" she sobs.
Echo rolls her eyes "Get a grip, this kind of stuff happens all the time." she says. Then these weird flying monkeys start coming through the walls. QSMB screams bloody murder. She's never told anyone before, but she's horrified of flying monekys. Then Nem the janitor runs in. "Have you met my cousins yet?" he asks "They can help us get out of here, isn't that neat?"
The flying monkeys help them get out of the wormhole, so they can decide on aonther, less wormholey destination.
THE END |
| | Posted 6/29/2004 8:25 PM - 55 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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